Uncovering You 10: The Finale Page 18

  We reach the entrance stairs to the basement. That area has been sequestered to house all of Dr. Telfair’s equipment. I’ve only been down there once. Being underground, it induced memories of my captivity. I almost had a panic attack.

  Luckily, Dr. Telfair realized what was happening and quickly ushered me out of there. That was pretty much the only near miss that I’ve suffered in my entire time here.

  He stops and looks at me and Jeremy. “Wait here,” he says with an eye toward me. “I’ll bring my computer and…”

  “It’s fine,” I interrupt. “We’ll go with you.”

  He blinks. “Excuse me?”

  I look at Jeremy and tighten my grip on his hand. He gives me a reassuring squeeze back. “We’ll come down there with you. I’ll be okay.”

  Dr. Telfair’s about to speak. But, then shuts his mouth and nods. “Okay.”

  He goes down first. I start to follow, and then I am tugged back by Jeremy. He looks at me in earnest. “Remember,” he says, “I’m right here with you. I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”

  “Thank you,” I give him a tight smile. Dammit! Now that I’m actually faced with the prospect of having to make good on my word, all my nerves are on edge.

  I focus on the warmth of Jeremy’s grip, on the strength emanating from him, and take my first step down.

  It’s a long, dark, narrow flight of stairs. I try to ignore the suffocating, claustrophobic feeling that the walls evoke.

  “Did you know that I fell into a pit underground when I was twelve?” I say to Jeremy. I struggle to keep my mind occupied with words and not focus on where I’m going. “I almost died in there. I thought I would.”

  “You never told me that,” Jeremy says. “Watch your step.” He points out a divot in the old stone stairs. “What happened?”

  “I was out exploring the woods,” I babble. “By myself. Actually, you know what? Memories of that time helped me get through the first weeks you kept me in the dark.”

  “Lilly…” Jeremy growls a warning. “This might not be the best time to talk about such things. Particularly given where we are?”

  “No, it’s all right,” I tell him. “I’ve moved past that. I can speak of it with no emotions attached,”

  “So what happened when you were twelve?” he asks, steering the subject toward safer waters.

  “I found an old, abandoned cabin. I scaled the wall and dropped inside. I looked around, then stumbled, and fell…” I trail off and shudder, suddenly recalling that grating, incessant, irritating bird. “…down rotted steps into the basement. I broke them all on the way down. And then, when I came to, I couldn’t reach…”

  “But you got out, obviously.” Jeremy smiles. “How’d you do it?”

  “See, the thing is: Even though I tried to build up some sort of platform to reach, in the end, it wasn’t me. It was…”

  I stop, realizing that the ending of the story is perhaps not the best thing to tell Jeremy.

  “It was what?” he asks.

  “It was… somebody else.” I mumble, under my breath. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter. It was so long ago. Hey, look.” I glance around the space before us. It’s filled with hooked up machines and medical equipment. “We made it!”

  “Who saved you, Lilly?” Jeremy prompts.

  “Somebody,” I say. He gives me an inscrutable stare. “A man,” I hedge.

  Before us, Dr. Telfair is booting up his computer and flipping the switches to turn on certain machinery.

  “Tell me,” Jeremy says. His voice carries that deep-seated command that I cannot say not to.

  I look at my feet, suddenly ashamed for hiding, then ashamed for being ashamed. “Paul,” I say. I shake my head. The auburn hairs of my wig fall around my face. “Paul saved me.”

  Jeremy’s eyes hone into me. “Paul?” he asks.

  “Yes,” I say.

  I can see the calculations going on his head. He’s considering that timeline. If I was twelve, it happened eleven years ago. That means that his mother and Paul were…

  “Why didn’t you tell me before?” Jeremy asks. For the first time in our whole getaway, he sounds angry.

  “I—didn’t think it was important,” I say quickly. I desperately want to change the subject. I look to Dr. Telfair for help. But his full attention is on the computer screen.

  “Important? Lilly, this is vital information. If you owe your life to Paul, and you didn’t tell me before…?” He trails off, looking seriously pissed now. He releases my hand and steps away.

  “So what?” I ask. “Would knowing that have changed how you’ve treated him? What does it matter? You know he’s my father. Obviously. You know his importance to me. He and I are linked by blood. So what if he saved me once? I owe my life to him just by virtue of being his daughter! It shouldn’t—doesn’t—change how you view him.”

  “No.” Jeremy says gravely. He places two fists against a brick wall. “But it changes how I view you.”

  “What are you talking about, Jeremy?” Irritation is slipping into my voice. Dr. Telfair says something in the background. I ignore him.

  Jeremy shakes his head. “If I had known…” he mutters.

  I stalk up to him, grab him by the shoulder, and spin him around. “Tell me!” I demand.

  Jeremy’s eyes narrow. They’ve become dark. It’s a dangerous look.

  It’s a look I know very well from when he was just Stonehart.

  But he wouldn’t hurt me now, so I’m unafraid.

  Jeremy glances over my shoulder at his brother. “Give us five minutes,” he says.

  Dr. Telfair starts to protest. But Jeremy cuts him off. “I said, five minutes. Now!”

  I start at the exclamation, and turn my head quickly. Dr. Telfair looks just as shocked. Then determination flows over his features.

  I placate him before he can speak. “It’s okay,” I say. “I need to talk to Jeremy. Preferably…” I glance at my future husband, the mirror image of his twin. “…alone. But only if you can condone it.”

  “If that’s what you want, Lilly,” he agrees reluctantly.

  “Yes,” I say. ‘It is.”

  Dr. Telfair gives a curt nod. He looks at his brother. “Five minutes, exactly,” he says. “And then I’ll be back.”

  “I’m counting on it.” Jeremy almost sneers.

  When the doctor leaves, I turn on Jeremy again. “So?” I demand. “What is it?”

  I only realize now how successful my attempt at warding off associations with being underground was. I haven’t thought of it once.

  “Paul’s dead,” Jeremy says simply.

  “What?” I stagger back. I feel like I’ve been punched in the gut. I grasp for something to hold on to. Finding nothing, I stumble to the nearest wall.

  Jeremy makes no move to comfort me.

  “Dead?” I whisper. “What? How?”

  “He killed himself by jumping off the cliffs behind my mansion in San Jose,” Jeremy says. Not a single shred of emotion enters his voice.

  “When?” I repeat.

  “Three weeks ago.”

  “Three weeks!” I gasp. I bring both hands up to cover my mouth. “Three weeks, Jeremy? Three weeks, and I’m only finding out now? You’re only telling me now?”

  “I discussed it with my brother. We both agreed. It was too soon. We would risk disrupting your equilibrium.”

  “He’s in on it, too?” I hiss. “Is that why you told him to leave the room?”

  “You need only one lightning rod for your anger,” Jeremy informs me. “That would be me.”

  “Anger,” I repeat. “Anger. Anger! You think I’m angry? I’m fucking furious!”

  “I did it solely for you,” he tells me. “For your benefit—and for your recovery. Nothing else.”

  “Oh, and that’s supposed to make me feel better?” I roar.

  “I had every intention of telling you…in time,” Jeremy says. “Once we deemed you ready.”

  “Oh, once you
deemed me ready. Is that it?” I scream. “Gee, thanks, Jeremy! That makes me feel so much better.” I wave my engagement ring in his face. “What about this, huh, Jeremy? What about truth? What about honesty? What about all those things you promised?”

  I’m starting to breathe really, really hard. I’m close to hyperventilating.

  Jeremy makes no attempt to calm me.

  “I did not lie,” he tells me in a voice as cold as ice and sharp as a freshly forged sword. “Did you ask me if your father was alive? No, you did not. Did you ask me how he was doing? No, you did not.”

  “I assumed…” I begin.

  Jeremy cuts me off without mercy. “And that’s your biggest flaw. You assumed, Lilly, without asking for confirmation. Remember all the times I ensured that I got verbal confirmation from you?” He stresses the words. “Why do you think that is? I did it to avoid situations exactly like this, were our roles reversed!”

  “Oh, so that’s what this is supposed to be, then?” I demand. “Some type of sick, twisted lesson for me?”

  “I did not say…”

  “Then what else?” I explode. “What else, Jeremy? Huh? Tell me. Tell me what else!”

  He looks at me. For a long moment, he does not speak. Then he says, with all the dispassionate distance he’d use to address a street beggar, “You’re becoming hysterical.”

  I am so pissed at him, so caught up in all the wrong emotions of the moment that I throw my head back and scream. Then I clutch at my hair like a mad woman, and pull.

  The strands come away.

  There’s no pain in my scalp. In fact, I feel nothing. For a moment, I just stare at the strands between my fingers, held out in front of me. A dull sort of question forms in the back of my mind.

  If I pulled my hair out, why didn’t I feel pain?

  And then the realization comes crashing into me. It’s not my hair. My hair is gone. My hair had been shaved away by Esteban and Hugh and Rose…

  And suddenly I’m right there again. I’m back underground, in that awful cell, surrounded by Esteban and his thugs, Big Man, Leader, the rapist…

  I stare around the room, not seeing anything, not seeing anybody but Esteban, Big Man, and Leader. Leader, here to rape me…

  Oh God!

  I give a horrible wail of despair and crumble to my knees. I rock back and forth, back and forth, running my hands over my head, again and again and again.

  I feel hair. Is this a fever dream? No! I’m still here. This is still reality…

  I give another mournful cry and start to sob, all the while rocking faster, faster, faster…

  Somebody runs up to me. Dr. Telfair, I think, though why that name comes to mind I cannot say. He yells, “What the fuck did you do?” at someone else, not at me, not at me…

  I bite my lips and start to quiver, so confused, so utterly terrified. I have hair. But I cannot feel it. Does that mean this is real? Does that mean this is fake?

  I tear at the strands, trying with all my might to rip it off, trying with all my might to determine whether this is real or all imagined…

  Dr. Telfair holds me by the shoulders. “Shush, shush,” he coos. I keep rocking. Another pair of hands takes hold of my arms and stops me from ripping at my hair. Strong hands. Big hands. Thick hands. Sure hands…

  Big Man’s hands?

  I wail once more and jerk away. My vision is spinning. There are two people before me. Two men. Two—

  Jeremy. And Dr. Telfair. Twins. They’re twins!

  And I’m here, underground with them, in a…

  A laboratory!

  The panic ebbs away. I can see clearly once more.

  “What—what happened?” I stammer. The objects above me all come into view. As do the two brothers.

  Neither looks at all pleased.

  “Yes, Jeremy,” Dr. Telfair says. “Please. Tell us what happened.” He makes a derisive sound and helps me to my feet. I stagger up, clinging onto his arm for support.

  Jeremy remains closed jawed and silent. He glares at me with something very close to loathing in his eyes.

  Dr. Telfair leads me away. I sit on a small bench by one cold, rocky, wall.

  He leans down and looks at me. “Are you all right?”

  “Yes,” I say. I feel weak and all shaky. But the worst has already passed.

  I brush the hair out of my eyes. Halfway through the motion, I stop and realize what I’m doing. I feel the wig’s strands—

  “Yes, Lilly, this is all real,” Dr. Telfair informs me gently. Jeremy is brooding somewhere in the background. “You’re safe from any further distresses…” He glances over his shoulder at his brother, “…for now.”

  Jeremy starts to approach. Dr. Telfair points at finger at him. “Don’t come any closer.”

  “I’ll do whatever I goddamn please,” Jeremy growls.

  Dr. Telfair rises and faces him directly. “What did you just say?” he challenges. He’s got the same determined look that Jeremy often wears. I know if they start arguing, it’ll be something like an immoveable object being hit by an unstoppable force. The only outcome is sheer calamity.

  I have to jump in to give one of them an edge.

  So I take a quick, deep breath, try to steady my nerves, and come up beside my doctor. Good thing I have heaps practice disguising my internal turmoil with an external mask.

  “Jeremy, I want to be alone with your brother,” I say. “At least he did not hide any vital information from me.”

  But not like he didn’t agree to it, a voice reminds me.

  Whatever. My fury is directed at Jeremy only. If I get mad at Dr. Telfair as well, then I’ll truly be alone.

  Besides…I have a sneaking suspicion that the true reason for the anger was that I am too much of a coward to properly mourn my father’s death.

  Jeremy stops short. He works his jaw. Clenching both fists.

  Then, without another word, he promptly turns on his heel and leaves.

  His footsteps echo all the way up the long, narrow stairs.

  Dr. Telfair looks at me. “That was a close call.” He adjusts his glasses. “How do you feel?”

  “Uncertain,” I admit. Thank God I told Dr. Telfair about my anchor. Otherwise, he’d have no way of understanding what I mean. “I thought…” I swallow. “I thought the injections are supposed to protect my mind.”

  “They do that, yes,” he tells me. “But like I said before, the key to their efficiency is your own mental strength. They shield you from the worst. The rest still is, and always has been, up to you.”

  “I almost fell into the hole,” I whisper.

  “But you didn’t.” He clasps my shoulders. “You pulled yourself back. I’m proud of you for that, Lilly.”

  “How much will that prize get me?” I mutter solemnly. “If I can’t trust myself to be safe, even with the injections…”

  “No,” Dr. Telfair cuts in. “You’re not to doubt yourself, Lilly. I won’t allow it. The fault lies not with you but with my brother. I heard your raised voices and rushed back. I caught only the tail end of the argument. Tell me. What happened?”

  “Jeremy… Jeremy told me about my father.”

  “Oh.” For a split second, Dr. Telfair looks crestfallen, “I am sorry about that, Lilly. I am equally at fault. You see, I…”

  “I know,” I say. “I know, and I don’t blame you. I don’t blame Jeremy either, for concealing the fact from me. I was angry…I got so angry, all because…”

  “It’s okay,” Dr. Telfair shakes his head. “You don’t need to explain anything, Lilly. I understand.”

  “Do you?” I ask. “Do you understand how weak I feel? How…frightened?”

  He nods. “I can’t feel those things for you, Lilly. But I understand.”

  “How can you?” I whisper.

  He exhales and takes off his glasses. He rubs the bridge of his nose just the way I’ve seen Jeremy do. I get an uncanny, discomfiting feeling of déjà vu.

  “I understand, Lilly
, because of the patients I’ve cared for previously. But more than that, I understand because I’ve seen the films.”

  “Films? What films?”

  “Recordings of everything that’s been done to you,” he says. “They were removed from Esteban’s manor following your rescue.”

  I swallow and look away.

  “Don’t be ashamed,” he reassures me.

  “I… I thought everything to do with that time had already been destroyed. It seemed so final. Now, knowing there are tapes…”

  “I wouldn’t let that bother you,” Dr. Telfair says. “How about some better news for a change of pace? Remember what I brought you here for?”

  “Oh yeah,” I smile weakly. “You made some discovery or other.”

  He smirks. “That’s putting it lightly.”

  “Well, I remember how ecstatic you were about it,” I say feeling my mood lifting. “What is it? What made you so excited?”

  “It’s about you, Lilly,” he says. He beckons me to a computer, which is hooked up to a huge projection screen. “Come. Take a look.”

  He types his password in to get past the screen lock. “Would you like to invite Jeremy in?” he asks. I shake my head. “Not yet. You can tell me first.”

  “Okay,” Dr. Telfair smiles. He pulls up a 3D model of a red blood cell. “Do you know what this is?”

  I’ve seen the movies. “I’ve done basic high school biology,” I quip.

  “But,” Dr. Telfair holds up a finger. “First, look at this.” One click of his mouse takes the camera into the cell, to the tightly-bound DNA strand. Dr. Telfair taps a large, heavy white machine that reminds me of an oversized refrigerator with one hand. “Thanks to this baby, I’ve been able to make out your personal DNA structure. Not in full, of course. That would take ridiculous amounts of processing power. But I’ve discovered the relevant, pertinent parts, at least. That’s what this machine has been doing for the past two months.”

  “Okay…” I say, somewhat confused.

  “But more importantly,” Dr. Telfair continues, growing really energetic now, “It’s been comparing your suitability for certain drug candidates. I’ve been working, all the time, on formulating a personalized treatment plan for you. Something designed just for you. Something that would work only with your body, your DNA.”